Why did you write in English?

Previously some people had asked me why I always post entries in English, why don't I use Malay instead of foreign language?

I have my own reason for that issue. To make it clear, let me explain a little bit to you.

Since I am a teacher-to-be, I need to improve more on my English language. Being an English teacher (soon) is not an easy thing to do. Yet it not as easy as teaching Bahasa Melaysia or Pendidikan Seni. There are some steps that we (teachers) need to follow as we learn and teach English which are :

Exposure - Practice - Use. 

If I learn English but I do not practice and use it, for sure I will not be able to teach my students later as they get more exposure in learning through the television or internet. I will be..umm.. sort of out of date. Well I'm pretty sure that when dealing with human, we will never know what will be expected. So before I educate people, I have to educate myself (in informal way). It's quite a big 'amanah' and responsible for me.

Sometimes when we practice through writing, there's a lot of mistakes and improvement that we can find out. For example, usually when it comes into spoken language, you tend to say :

1. You are coming or not? 
2. Faster faster faster!

Actually the sentences are totally WRONG! You should say :

1. You are coming, aren't you?
2. Come on, hurry up!

Do you get what I mean? Thus, what I want to emphasis here is when we talk, we rarely speak with the correct grammatical structure. However when we write, we always check whether the grammar is correct or vice versa. So if we keep practicing our English language by writing, we can speak English language with the correct way as it should be.

Alright. I think that's enough for tonight. Till then, good night people. Lots of love =)


p/s: Gua tak dak niat langsung nak berlagak ke hape taip entry omputeh. Setakat nak belajar and practice pun salah ke? Puiiii

Time

There is a time when you feel like it's the time to be serious where you need to think, plan and pray seriously.

I am on that timeline.

I am supposed to...



p/s: My pain is released when I see the picture of my cousin (photoshoot).

More pictures in http://thejoezakaria.com/arda-hearts-syaiful. Credit to photographer Joe Zakaria.

p/s: Aren't she look so beautiful and gorgeous?

Yes. She is. I love you Kak Arda =)

Maybe

Maybe part of love is learning to let go.


It's not that you don't suit me well or you're too good for me.


It's just...


Me.


The matter is I'm not ready for any relationship.


I... want to be alone.


I don't know until when..


I'm sorry...

Expertist

One of our lecturers tells us that :

You will never be an expert of English language until you :

1. dream and speak English (while you are dreaming)
2. can talk on the stage or in front of thousands people spontaneously
3. speak fluently with the correct grammatical structures

Then all of us stare to each other and keep silence. Do we reach the title of the 'expert'?

Durrhhh. Maybe someday. Hahahaha XD

Oh another thing is we learn the art subject this afternoon whereby we have to draw anything that we can imagine at that time. This is our first class of drawing. So we don't expect much from the result. Actually I was born not to be talented in this field. I only know how to draw 'orang lidi'. Pergh. Pathetic, right?

There it goes my drawing. But before scrolling down, promise me that you won't laugh.

Don't laugh, okay?

Damn. I know you are laughing. Pfffttttttttttt

Sketch

One for me, one for you. Eh did I just mention you? ;-)

the draft

I was being sketched by Rafe. For the first time someone did sketch the photo of mine and it's mouse sketch! Sob sob sob T.T *terharu*

the product!

Thank you so much Rafe. I really appreciate this! And I love it so so so muchhhhhhhh <3

Does heaven has a phone number?

Hello Operator,

Can I have heaven's phone humber?
I need to call my friend, Hakim who was there,
I need him here today,
My heart hurts and I fell down; I need him right away,
Operator, can you tell me how to find his name in this book?

Is heaven in the yellow part? I don't know where to look.
I think my other friends need him too,
I hear them call his name sometimes,
I want to tell him Izuari, Izat, Nada, Hamzah, Ayeem miss him too.

Does heaven's numbers is here?
Because I need to speak to him,
I need to ask does he feels better?
Maybe if I call him, he will hurry to me.
I'm sure he'll be happy,
when I tell him I've become somebody,
as I promise to change to be what I should be,
and I'm not the old me.

Is Heaven very far away, is it across the sea?
He's been gone quite a time,
I really need to reach him, but I simply don't know how.

Help me find the number please, is it listed under "Heaven"?
I can't read these big, big words,
I'm sorry, operator, I didn't mean to make you cry,
Is your tummy hurting too, or is there something in your eye?

Oh you didn't have the numbers?

Thank you operator, I'll find it the other time...


:'(




p/s: The original poem was about sad poem for mom written by anonymous but I edited and changed a bit to produce this one. So no offence, thank you.

Kaca Hati

 " Dengan perangai awak semua macam ni, jangan harap awak nak lulus exam. Cikgu tak redha dengan apa yang awak buat. Bla bla bla.....".

Dialog cikgu sekolah aku beberapa tahun lalu. Peringatan yang memang aku ingat sampai sekarang jadahnya sebab aku langgar peraturan. Rules. Peraturan. Bukan semua orang suka ikut peraturan. Aku? Certain-certain aku ikut ah. Selebihnya kalau melampau sangat jangan harap aku nak ambil peduli. Kau?

pic from Google

Bila teringat zaman sekolah aku, aku mesti tak sangka yang aku sekarang berada di sini, di tempat yang akan bawa aku melangkah untuk kembali ke sekolah lagi. Bukan sebagai pelajar, tapi up sikit ah. Bagi aku, zaman persekolahan banyak ajar aku perkara yang tidak ada dalam syllabus. Kawan. Dunia. Keluarga. Realiti. Hakikat. Semua kau akan rasa sendiri pahit manis. Walaupun jatuh tersungkur, kau sendiri yang perlu bangkit kembali. Kalau nak kira dulu aku pun jenis kategori nakal. Kena rotan, kena panggil oleh guru disiplin, kena announce dalam assembly, dimalukan depan semua students, tu dah jadi perkara biasa dalam hidup aku. Jenis kaki bawak masalah. Bulan lepas aku praktikal dan aku dapat student sebijik perangai macam aku dulu. Pergh. Awal- awal dah dapat balasan. (-_-)

Mengikut pengalaman aku sepanjang praktikal tu, budak jenis nakal ni dah tak boleh nak lentur dengan kekerasan dan kegarangan. Rotan sampai mampuih pun tak dak kesan hape pun. Psychology should takes place. Sekarang semua nak kena pakai psychology. Kalau nak lempang terajang jawabnya esok kau masuk lokap kena saman dengan parents. Permulaannya kau memang kena boo balik kalau kau psycho diorang dengan cara baik dan lembut. Tetapi lama-lama kau akan nampak kesan positif, dan saat tu confirm kau dapat tidoq lena berdengkur ternganga dengan gembira.

Jadi aku nak ingatkan semua cikgu termasuk aku sendiri. Sebelum kau maki hamun anak murid kau sebab perangai buruk, kau kena maki hamun diri sendiri sebab tak pernah ambil tahu kehidupan students kau sendiri. Don't expect that you know them well if you only see them in your class twice a week. Jangan judge mereka dengan pandangan kasar kau di sekolah. They are totally different outside the school.

Lagi satu, ilmu ni berkatnya ada pada restu guru jugak. Kadang-kadang kau study sampai nak mampuih pun tapi kalau guru kau tak redha mungkin kau takkan dapat tahap yang kau sepatutnya capai. However, tak semestinya sebab kau cikgu, kau boleh suka hati kau nak tentukan yang mana students yang kau redha dan yang mana kau tak. Kalau kau berhati busuk, lebih baik kau tarik diri dari profession ni. Kau tak layak, jangan aniayai generasi baru yang tak bersalah. Pada pandangan kau, budak yang bermasalah itu adalah beban hidup yang menyemakkan setiap saat hidup kau. Tapi pernah tak kau fikir dia adalah anugerah Tuhan kepada kau untuk kau didik dan bukan untuk kau herdik?

Jangan anggap tanggungjawab kau sebagai rintangan dan bebanan. Jangan salahkan mereka selagi kau belum betul-betul mencurah bakti yang sepatutnya. Bersabar, lakukan apa yang sepatutnya dan bertindak professional. Awalnya memang perit, sampai tahap kau rasa kau dah surrender. But in the end you will find how worth it is. Trust me.

Bukan senang nak jadi cikgu. Bukan semua cikgu layak dipanggil cikgu sejati. Dan kau tak layak dipanggil cikgu kalau kerja kau hanya masuk kelas, pot pet pot pet dan keluar. Teaching is a work of heart. Setiap seorang pelajar kau ibarat permata, kalau kau jaga dan didik mereka dengan baik, insha allah sampai akhir nyawa kau ilmu kau curah takkan hilang. Insha Allah doa mereka yang akan bantu kau di alam sana. Ingatlah, jangan pandah rendah dan hina pada students kau. Try to imagine this. Satu masa nanti kau ditakdirkan menghidap penyakit kronik. Kau berada pada saat genting menunggu kedatangan doktor dalam operation room. Then kau kena bius dan tak sedarkan diri. Dengan izin Allah, operation tu berjaya dan kau selamat. Bila kau buka mata, orang pertama yang kau pandang ialah doktor yang operate kau.

Dan doktor tu adalah anak murid kau yang kau pernah maki hamun dulu.

...................




p/s: Kadang-kadang aku rasa mungkin ada hikmah aku tercampak dalam profession ni.

Aku dan Hostel #1 : Hikayat Malam Pertama

2003. Batch aku (form 3) pecah rekod sebab paling ramai couple especially dengan budak form 5. Cikgu pun dah naik gila. Hari-hari asyik announcement panggil couple masuk bilik discipline. Biasalah smka, benda-benda macam ni memang dianggap salah. Nak dipendekkan cerita, ade sorang budak kelas aku ni yang kitorang panggil Jemiludin tiap-tiap hari dok sampaikan pesanan salam dari mamat form 5 yang aku sendiri tak kenal rupa. Katanye mamat tu ketua dorm die. Kononnye syok kat aku sampai tido malam, ngigau2 lagi tu. Hampeh. Yang aku tahu Jemiludin ni memang si tukang karut sedunia.

Then dari hari ke hari si Jemiludin ni tak putus-putus sampaikan pesanan dari mamat tu. At last si Jemiludin ni tunjuk jugak yg mane satu mamat tu kat aku time kitorg nak pegi lab. Yang tak tahannye lepas tu time makan kt dewan makan, si mamat cilakak a.k.a Brad Pitt celup tu selalu je makan mengadap aku. Time aku kat library pun meja kitorg bersebelahan. Dlm khemah rumah sukan pun dok sebelah-sebelah. Bukan aku yang perasaan lebih, tapi memang betul + nampak terang-terang kot, sampai member2 baik aku pun tegur. Tak tipu okay! Bila aku pandang dia, dia sengih-sengih.. Aku apelagi. Muntah berhingus berdarah semua keluar. Macam sial. Ceit.

Sebulan sebelum PMR. Aku dengan member aku plan nak panjat aspura (asrama lelaki) sebab nak pekenakan si kaki angau tu. Pukul 2.30 pagi lampu bilik study aspura padam. Check2 line semua dah tido. So kitorang merayap merangkak naik tangga aspura. Yang aku taw si Brad Pitt celup ni dorm 5 tingkat 2. So aku berbekalkan t-shirt, tracksuit n towel bersedia memulakan misi visi kami. Towel tu untuk tutup kepala – konon-kononnye nk menyamar jadi lelaki yg baru bangun nk pegi mandi kt toilet. Kalau aku pakai tudung dah sah-sah orang tahu aku ni pompuan! Sebelum tu aku pi rembat bedak Carry Junior satu botol besar kepunyaan classmate aku yg sedang tido terlentang kt dorm 6 (nama dirahsiakan). Lepas itu aku meneruskan mission 003 pedajalkan si Brad Pitt kesayangan itu.

Nak dipendekkan cerita lagi, habis satu muka dia termasuk badan kena mekap and gincu dek aku dan member aku. Si brad pitt tu pulak haram jadah tido tak sedar hape pun. Dah la tido berdengkur mengalahkan stadium bola. Ikut hati mau jek aku terajang sampai jatuh katil tapi bila terfikirkn misai warden aku Cikgu Juka ala-ala A.Galak tu terus aku cancel. Tengah kitorg syok menghias si badut sorang ni tiba2 ade bunyi benda jatuh. Kitorg pun apa lagi. Cabut lari cam nak mati. Sampai kat aspuri sedar-sedar key chain kertas bentuk love yang aku letak kt dalam poket seluar aku dah takde.

Esoknye kecoh satu aspura yang budak aspuri pecah masuk dorm diorang malam tadi. Stunt girls yang terlibat tu tak dapat dikenal pasti. Yang paling takleh blah si Brad Pitt pegi kecoh kat semua orang yang secret admire die panjat hostel sebab nak letak love letter punye key chain kat atas katil dia. Pegi mati. Yang pastinya sampai sekarang dia berhutang key chain tu dengan aku!

Spontaneous Thursday : Sexy Voice

I wake up and try to call my mom when suddenly I realize that I've lost my voice. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I am

1. rude
2. unfriendly
3. out-of-date
4. not a good friend
5. bad tempered
6. talkative
7. stubborn
8. straight forward
9. stone heart
10. not sweet

If you want to ask about me, I would say that I'm all above. Thank you.

Sentimental Values

My day was good until an 'amoi' broke my watch while replacing the battery. I felt like screaming because that was my only watch I ever have! I owned it since I was 17 which means 7 years already and now it was broken because of a careless girl who did not do her job well. Urgh. Luckily Im still a human and not a robot. If not I might change into transformer and don't you ever imagine what will I do.

I always stick to one thing at one time. I'm not the type of person who have a lots of 'things' such as watch or handphone and change them every time I go out. That's not me. For me, one is enough as long as it can be used. That watch, it might look a small thing to some people because it only costed for two hundred ++ ringgit but I bought it with my own money which I had saved for more than two months. Being a student and at the same time you had to save money and stop yourself from buying enough food was not an easy thing to do. Yet I was not the daughter of prime minister or rich people. I'm just an ordinary girl and my dad had taught me since I was a child that I should work for my own if I want to get something. So the value of the things that you got by own self was still there. It would never be the same with the new one.

the old one and the only :-(

See. The screw couldn't be used anymore. Sob sob sob T.T

As I'm the one who can't live without a watch, I buy a new one (the cheapest) which only cost RM10. It just for a short of time, I don't know how long it will 'stay' with me. At least it's better than not having any of it right? I need to save more money to buy the best one which will be lasting until my last breathe. Pheww~

the new one

Second thing, my handphone did not function anymore. I've been using it since 2006. At that time, I worked as a part time worker at A&W and I bought it with my 3 months salaries. Now it can't be used anymore. *sigh*

my hp - SE W660i (pic from Google)

Sometimes I dream that I marry the son of the dato' where I can buy anything that I want without thinking of the payment. But the real life is not as beautiful as you think. Wake up and work harder for your own sake. Oh life is so unfair.




p/s: Kahwin dengan orang kaya? Berangan je kau Izma. Puiiii.


Thanks for reading. Good night people.

Wardrobe Clearance

Yesterday was my uncle's wedding. So we were quite busy the whole week, preparing for the meaningful day. A lot of things had to clear up including my cousins stuff as well as my own stuff. At last, we decided to do the 'wardrobe clearance' and sell those items. Do visit here :

http://sumptuous-sweetie.blogspot.com/

Thanks. Peace yo! :)

Heart

pic from Google

Did you know that the jihad is not only in your action? It is also in your nafs and heart. There are 3 types of heart.

1. Sick Heart
2. Dead Heart
3. Healthy Heart

Healthy heart is the heart which full with good things own by the good muslims who always remember God and do things to increase their iman.

According to Imam Al-Ghasibi, the dead heart can't be alive again  because annur (light) can't pass through the dead heart.

Knowledge is annur (light). When Allah gives you hidayah, that's mean He gives you light. When light can't pass through heart, theres no hidayah. Then it will become the dead heart. When you get into this situation, you can't go out.

However, the sick heart can be cure. When you committed wrong doing, do taubah and replace the 'dark spot' with good things. It is also known as purification of the heart (tazkiyatun nafs).


So which types of heart are you?