"Knock... Knock.. Knock..."
"Yes, come in. Have a seat please. Mind me asking, are you Miss Izatil Aqmar?"
"Yes, I am."
"Oh okay. The reason why I called you just now is because you have to report your duty at SMK K******** today. So, have a nice day and enjoy your teaching."
First day in school. To be honest, this is my first time teaching the secondary students. I was in primary school before but I have no idea that I will be placed in secondary school. Actually it is a smart secondary school (cluster). Some of my friends said that it will be much easy to deal with students compared to pupils. I doubt that. Of course it will be more challenging for me as a fresh graduate teacher. I'm dealing with those so-called grown-up teenagers, not the young cute children anymore. Well, just wait and see. Hmmm..
When I first enter those classes (form 2, 3 & 4), they really give me the very bad impression. Since I am just a small, young teacher who look likes a joker to them, they try to play around with me. Grrrr. Maybe I should consider that as a normal thing happens to a beginner teacher. In overall, a week in school is not great enough. Students rebel, they screw things up, they don't enter the class and they never finish their homework. Not a litle bit. Not even at all. *sigh*
"Hey hey, teaching can't be that hard." I tell to myself (trying to calm myself down). I have master the pedagogical theory, I have spent 6 years in university to learn to be the best English teacher, so now it's time to practice daily. Yeah! Be strong, be cheerful, be thankful, be grateful enough Izma! Go go go!
So here I begin.
From greeting students to take attendance, motivating them to deal with any school programs, attending department meetings, coaching a sport team in the evening after school, making a test, handling a paper work project for becoming academic camping, getting test scores up, tutoring any student who just isn't getting it. At night, I burn the midnight oil just to prepare any teaching aid and material for the next day. Technically I'm working all day long from the time I wake up in the morning to the time I finally fall asleep (sometimes I didn't sleep at all). Oh God, I'm exhausted. (and speechless). I never know that teachers are expected to juggle a lot of various tasks at once and we are expected to do a damn good job every we are involved. It is worth in the end, but trust me there's no way you can say that it's a simple job. A big NO.
Moreover, my students keep misbehaved. I don't know what's wrong with them. Sometimes I keep thinking are they human? They have kind of amazing energy (which is actually more than the normal person has!). They keep moving here, moving there, play here, play there, shout and scream everywhere. Maybe nowadays school is actually a zoo, not a school anymore. Okay sorry about that. Over thinking, my bad.
At that time, I know I can't let this be. I should make a move, because the fact is people change. So, I become a fierce teacher (like a lion roarrrrrrrrrrr) and I'm very strict when it comes into homework or class lesson. They are surprised to see the way I change. They start to behave because if they are not, they will get some punishments from me.
However, I don't feel happy about that. I can see that they are doing everything because they don't want to be punished. They don't learn by their heart. They do it just for the sake of their duty as the student. In other words, they just want to pass the exam. They never love this subject (English). For sure, they absorb what I teach during the class and then after the class everything will slowly fly from their mind like a dandelion dust. As their teacher, I always think and worry about them. Yaa, teaching is a passion. A privilege.
That's why I must make a change.
I have to.
........... To be continued.... stay tuned!